During the holidays you took care of friends and family, possibly to the exclusion of you. Now’s the time to think of you and keep yourself in the equation of your life. A high self-esteem allows you to risk and the more you risk the more you get. So, read this article and get ideas on how to build your self-esteem so you can have the year you want and the life you deserve.

Loving Yourself – Learning And Practicing Behaviors Necessary To Build Your Self Esteem

This is your gentle reminder of your continuing work on your self-esteem, and positive self-image. You really have started on a path of “healing from your source”. Everyday we have opportunities to bring in positive thoughts and messages about ourselves and our lives; We just have to learn how to be conscious and aware of these opportunities.

The purpose of this message is to bring to you an affirmation/meditation that you can utilize throughout your day, and throughout the week so that your thoughts, your energy and ultimately, your feelings about yourself become more positive and your life will reflect these changes. Remember, you really are “Well Within”; you are simply accessing it consciously now.

This week we are focusing on Loving Yourself.

I am not talking about egotistical love. I am talking about the kind of love that is compassionate, understanding, and nonjudgmental. The kind of love we all look for in life; the kind of love we all wished for as children growing up; the kind of love we hope we’re giving to our children and people closest to us. I am talking about the kind of love that is unconditional; that feels warm and tender and safe and secure within our hearts and souls. So, what does it mean to love yourself this way? Loving yourself stems from the belief that “Who I am is enough”; that the qualities I possess as a person are worthwhile, special, and unique. This is the center of what it means to love yourself. The question everyone always asks is: “Yes, but how do I get there?!”

Allow yourself to take a slow deep breath, in through your nose, and release gently with a sigh through your mouth. — As you feel your body relax and become open to receiving a new message, I want you to picture yourself. Imagine that you are looking at yourself in the mirror. — Who do you see? — (Not what do you see?) Let your judgments pass by (you know the ones I mean: I’m too fat, or my hair needs washing, or I look tired, or old or I have too many wrinkles, or I need a hair cut.—) Just allow these judgments to pass by. Breathe in and out slowly and deeply— and look again at yourself in your mind’s eye. Now see who you really are. Focus on your inner qualities. Are you a good friend, a good listener, kind, understanding, compassionate and caring to others, sensitive, witty, fun to be with, someone who enjoys a good laugh, someone who is helpful, intelligent, a hard worker, reliable, etc. You know what I’m talking about.

Maybe it will help to think about your best friend, (or spouse, or close family member, or your spiritual leader, or colleague) and what you like and admire in him/her. What would this person say that they like about you? What makes you their best friend, &/or special in their lives? Stop for a moment and really allow yourself to ponder this thought. Take another deep breath and sit with what these qualities are. If you are struggling with this part, please, take a break from reading this and pick up the phone and call this person and ask him/her to tell you what they love about you. Let yourself hear what they have to say. Write down the qualities that they tell you. Look at the messages and allow yourself to breathe them into your body, your mind and your soul. You know the words are true because they feel so good. Please, admit it to yourself that way down deep inside you, you enjoy knowing these qualities that you possess feel good to you, because you know they are true. Let the good feelings flow through you and around you. Take a deep breath and picture yourself in the mirror once again, and allow yourself to REALLY see who you are! That’s it, breathe and stay with this warm, loving feeling. Take a deep breath and say: “I am lovable, capable, worthwhile and special and I deserve to be treated as such, by myself & others in my life!”

Take another deep breathe and really let the message sink in. Say this statement again allowing yourself to breathe in slowly and deeply and feel where it goes in your body. “I am lovable, capable, worthwhile and special and I deserve to be treated as such, by myself & others in my life!” Does it flow freely or does it get stuck. Just breathe— and repeat the statement again, out loud. Hear the words resonate in your room, not just in your head. This is a statement, along with “Who I am is enough!” that must repeated over and over again as you go through your days and your week. Finding your self-esteem and bringing it forth is what this work is all about, and we’ll journey together as you uncover and discover how lovable you really are!

Loren Gelberg-Goff loren@wellfromwithin.com journey to self-esteem and self-empowerment to live authentically self-esteem

For more information about our services and self-esteem products for your journey to self-esteem, visit http://www.WellfromWithin.com

Article Source: http://EzineArticles.com/?expert=Loren_Gelberg-Goff

By Pam Golden 

“Like a drop of water falling on a rock, daily messages of criticism gradually, imperceptibly leave a destructive effect on children.” – Thomas Gordon 

“The problem with you is you don’t enjoy your food! Why can’t you just chew it slowly instead of gulping it down?” Josie said to her 11-year-old son. 

What’s wrong with the picture?

It sounds so simple doesn’t it? Josie thought she was giving good, well-meaning advice – constructive criticism. Yet the effects of those small comments often left her son feeling humiliated, angry and resentful. As with most “constructive criticism,” Josie focused on what was wrong with her son. I call this “Storm Cloud Criticism” because, just like a storm can devastate a community, certain types of criticism can devastate your child’s self-esteem and motivation. 

Over time kids begin to see themselves as bad, irresponsible, thoughtless, dumb, inadequate, unloved, and even unlovable. This negative self-concept can carry into adulthood, crippling them for a lifetime. 

What to do instead – Give Gentle, Appealing Feedback

When you take a wrong turn while driving, the last thing you need is for someone to tell you how wrong you are. What you need is help getting on the right path with a method that is inviting. You can do that with what I call “Sunshine Feedback.”

When giving “Sunshine Feedback.” 

1. Start with a friendly beginning – how you start is usually how it ends. Instead of: “I’m tired of you wasting time watching television.” Try: “It looks like you’re really enjoying that show.”

2. Express your concern and ask for their ideas. Instead of: “You need to turn off television and do your homework now!” Try: ”I know you have homework tonight and I’m concerned you won’t get it done. When are you planning on doing it?”

3. Agree on a solution-what they come up with themselves they are way more likely to do. Instead of: “Alright, you said you’d get it done right after your television show, you better do it.” Try: “That sounds good, you’ll do your homework as soon as this show is over. Enjoy!”

4. Calmly follow-up: This may be the most critical step. When you take the time to calmly follow-up, your kids soon begin to take you at your word and they also begin to take their word seriously. If you let it slide, they begin to lose trust in you and in themselves. Instead of: “What’s the matter with you? You haven’t even started your homework and your show was finished ages ago.” Try: “I thought we agreed you’d do your homework right after your show. Can you get to it now?” OR Try: “You finished your homework right on schedule. That must feel good.”

5. Have a Happy Ending: How you end the encounter will linger and probably be how you start the next one.  No matter what happened, find a way to leave a sweet taste with both of you. If it’s gone well, say, “Thanks.” If it hasn’t gone well, you can say, something like, “Well. This didn’t turn out as well as I’d hoped, but thanks for sticking in there. We’ll do better next time.” 

Also, did you know that one type of praise can produce self-defeating behavior and anxiety, while another can move your kids to positive action? Changing a few words can make a night and day difference in your child’s life. If you like to get started learning how to give praise that motivates positive action while building self-esteem and confidence in your child please download my FREE Report on “The Amazing Impact of Effective Praise” at: http://www.basiclifeskillsforchildren.com/amazingpraise 

Article Source: http://EzineArticles.com/?expert=Pam_Golden

By Pinky Mcbanon 

A growing-up child should be able to develop their self-confidence since it is fundamental in helping them to becoming a complete and whole individual and what that is not afraid to strive for the very best in order to achieve their goals and aspirations in life. Clothing and food alone will not make your child have the confidence and courage. Instead, it is mainly factors that are non-physical such as spending time and encouragement that can help your child develop self-confidence.

Below are 4 tips to help your child gain self confidence.

1.    The children will absolutely look up to their mother and father as role models. Children mimic everything about their parents; from the way they talk, walk, behave as well as dressing and other ways. One example for this is that when they have misunderstandings or problems whether it is from work and or aspects. It is very important not to discuss negative problem-solving ideas in front of the child so that they will not inherit it.

2.    When helping your children with their studies or home work be sure not to spoon feed them. You can do some part of their assignments before explaining clearly enough for them to do it by themselves. Aside from that this will also help you keep tabs on your children’s ability to learn things which are very important when it comes to the child’s self-improvement and confidence.

3.    Make your kid gets involved in some form of sports especially team games. It is not only good to build upon their strengths physically but also able to add to the kid’s inertia or inner strength as well as self-esteem on believing in themselves. Aside from this,  it can also help them develop their camaraderie in one team and improving their sense of sportsmanship. It is also a way of making them learn how to accept defeat wherein they can stand up again and strive to do better in future.

4.    Next, always encourage them to meet new friends. It could either be your neighbors or new friends from the nearby park and such. It can help your child develop the self-confidence needed to socialize and to communicate. At the same time, it will also allow your child to display his/her talents when you organize fun-filled activities such as singing sessions or any talent-time among the kids in the neighborhood.

The above 4 tips, when practiced to the fullest, will go a long way in helping your child gain their self-confidence.

Pinky is a mom with 3 school children. A Systems Engineer, an Independent Medical Billing and Coding Consultant. Her blog focuses on stay-at-home moms, dads and students who wants to work at home, build homebased business or just browsing her blog with a lot of information to gain! Visit her useful blog at http://ezonlinebusiness.blogspot.com/ and website at http://www.mommyisworkingathome.com

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